Why am I here?

One of life's great ponderings.

To learn to love without condition.

Some people teach us how to love unconditionally by being, shall we say, hard to love. Those that are the hardest to love may be giving us the most love by helping us to learn to love in that way.

And those that are the hardest to love, probably need more love than the rest, all put together!

I have had many in my life who have been, in many ways, almost impossible to love. Their actions, their words, everything about them has been agony and yet, when push comes to shove, you always send them love.

For many, the most difficult love affair is the one we have with ourself. Until we love ourselves, can we really and truly love someone else?

And watching our friends who do not love themselves can be agony, as they lurch through life, every self-destructive act a cry for love, a demand for attention and sympathy from outside of themselves when the only true source of the love they need comes from within. Over and over the scene plays, and we offer sympathy, empathy, encouragement and support; sometimes the best thing to do is to leave them to it, with our love, and wait for them to learn the lesson for themselves.

With our children, for example, we accept that there are rites of passage. These are things that, though we love them dearly, we can't do for them, and we can't be with them in person, but we send them off with a hug and a kiss, to sit exams, to take a driving test, because they have to do it alone. We still love them, and we are showing them how much by letting them learn to stand on their own feet.

And sometimes we, even as adults, endure the pain of abandonment, and loss. But through these things we grow and become strong.To establish itself, a tree is exposed to the elements; being blown in the wind strengthens the branches and the trunk. Through these things we attain skills and qualities; if we can maintain joy and love, whatever happens, we are learning well, and are growing closer to fulfilling our "purpose," which is to develop the greatest, most beautiful love there is.